Crap perscriptions and shitty situations

I have to say I am feeling pretty down at the moment. I just cut ties with an old and dear, yet distructive friend. She was the one who led me to self harm, I guess.
Goddamn it's hard to even type that. I cared about her so much, I still do. I guess it was just too much for me, you know? Just having my own problems (in abundance) then having to be there for her when she would starve herself or slice up her legs or try to overdose. To be fair, I did all of those things too, till my parents found my blades. They took me out of school, which I guess let me recover. Now, I'm never going back to that. I'm done wearing jackets through the summer and constanty starving and depressed. I've changed, and the last thing I need is for an old friend to bring all of it down. 
But I wish there was a way, and I'm sure that the antidepressance are doing ratshit to help.
*sigh*
does it end?